1
00:00:01,050 --> 00:00:02,457
Who wants the
last dumpling?
2
00:00:02,459 --> 00:00:03,833
Ooh, me!
3
00:00:03,835 --> 00:00:05,266
Penny, a moment.
4
00:00:05,268 --> 00:00:07,372
We just had Thai food.
5
00:00:07,374 --> 00:00:10,045
In that culture,
the last morsel is called
6
00:00:10,047 --> 00:00:13,425
the "greng jie" piece,
and it is reserved for
7
00:00:13,427 --> 00:00:16,337
the most important
and valued member of the group.
8
00:00:21,880 --> 00:00:25,345
Thank you all
for this high honor.
9
00:00:26,713 --> 00:00:30,062
I've seen pictures
of your mother; keep eating.
10
00:00:34,782 --> 00:00:38,109
All right, honey, if we're gonna
make the movie, we should go.
11
00:00:41,679 --> 00:00:43,967
This may be hard
for you to hear,
12
00:00:43,969 --> 00:00:46,802
but when I say "honey,"
I mean my fiancée.
13
00:00:48,856 --> 00:00:51,618
Yeah, well, now it means her.
14
00:00:53,649 --> 00:00:55,701
It's okay if he
wants to come.
15
00:00:55,703 --> 00:00:57,987
Fine. But next time,
we get a sitter.
16
00:00:59,747 --> 00:01:01,665
All right, I got to go to work.
I'll walk down with you.
17
00:01:01,667 --> 00:01:03,188
Wait.
18
00:01:03,190 --> 00:01:05,964
Which is closer to the new
train store in Monrovia,
19
00:01:05,966 --> 00:01:08,077
the movie theater
or The Cheesecake Factory?
20
00:01:08,079 --> 00:01:10,208
Neither of them are close.
21
00:01:10,210 --> 00:01:12,157
Oh, well, then I guess
it doesn't matter which one
22
00:01:12,159 --> 00:01:13,074
of you drives me.
23
00:01:13,076 --> 00:01:14,482
Let's play a fun guessing game
24
00:01:14,484 --> 00:01:16,264
to see who gets to take me.
25
00:01:16,266 --> 00:01:19,661
All right, this four-letter word
describes either
26
00:01:19,663 --> 00:01:23,499
a printer's type size
or a compulsion to eat dirt.
27
00:01:23,501 --> 00:01:25,321
Okay, I'm not driving him.
28
00:01:25,323 --> 00:01:27,504
Penny, don't give up,
you can get this.
29
00:01:30,788 --> 00:01:33,469
Aren't you going
with Sheldon?
30
00:01:33,471 --> 00:01:36,804
No, I have no interest
in model trains,
31
00:01:36,806 --> 00:01:40,465
stores that sell them, nor
their heartbreaking clientele.
32
00:01:40,467 --> 00:01:41,737
Oh.
33
00:01:41,739 --> 00:01:44,905
Well, I have
some work to do, so...
34
00:01:44,907 --> 00:01:46,662
I can't imagine
that would disturb me.
35
00:01:46,664 --> 00:01:47,987
Carry on.
36
00:01:47,989 --> 00:01:51,460
Okay.
37
00:01:51,462 --> 00:01:53,398
Wouldn't you be
more comfortable at home?
38
00:01:57,433 --> 00:01:59,654
Not really, no.
39
00:01:59,656 --> 00:02:01,916
All righty then.
40
00:02:01,918 --> 00:02:04,154
Guess I'll just
get started.
41
00:02:04,156 --> 00:02:06,359
Leonard, please. I don't need
the running commentary.
42
00:02:08,004 --> 00:02:11,597
** Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state **
43
00:02:11,599 --> 00:02:14,885
** Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! **
44
00:02:14,887 --> 00:02:16,544
** The Earth began to cool **
45
00:02:16,546 --> 00:02:19,257
** The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools **
46
00:02:19,259 --> 00:02:21,763
** We built the Wall **
** We built the pyramids **
47
00:02:21,765 --> 00:02:24,460
** Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery **
48
00:02:24,462 --> 00:02:26,346
** That all started
with a big bang **
49
00:02:26,348 --> 00:02:28,000
** Bang! **
50
00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:32,000
The Big Bang Theory, S05E03
"The Pulled Groin Extrapolation"
51
00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:36,000
De Mikhel, exclusivo para Subtitulos.es
- DIFUNDE LA PALABRA -
52
00:02:54,473 --> 00:02:55,556
Amy?
53
00:02:55,558 --> 00:02:57,048
Yo.
54
00:02:57,050 --> 00:02:59,191
You okay?
55
00:02:59,193 --> 00:03:00,907
Oh, sure.
56
00:03:01,894 --> 00:03:03,837
I thought you were reading.
57
00:03:03,839 --> 00:03:06,003
I was.
58
00:03:06,005 --> 00:03:08,600
Now I'm thinking about
what I read.
59
00:03:20,701 --> 00:03:22,221
You all right, Leonard?
60
00:03:22,223 --> 00:03:24,481
You seem very uncomfortable.
61
00:03:24,483 --> 00:03:27,635
I-I'm fine.
62
00:03:27,637 --> 00:03:29,542
Should I go?
63
00:03:29,544 --> 00:03:31,937
I've been told sometimes
I overstay my welcome.
64
00:03:31,939 --> 00:03:35,244
Wha... who told you that?
65
00:03:35,246 --> 00:03:39,344
Well, most recently
my gynecologist.
66
00:03:44,447 --> 00:03:47,220
Well, you stay
as long as you'd like.
67
00:03:47,222 --> 00:03:48,894
I'm glad to hear you say that,
68
00:03:48,896 --> 00:03:51,889
because I'm having
a wonderful time.
69
00:03:51,891 --> 00:03:52,992
(chuckles)
70
00:03:52,994 --> 00:03:56,525
I said the same thing
to my gynecologist.
71
00:04:00,549 --> 00:04:03,458
What are you going to get
at the train store, Sheldon?
72
00:04:03,460 --> 00:04:05,382
Oh, I'm not
buying anything.
73
00:04:05,384 --> 00:04:07,516
They're having a lecture.
74
00:04:07,518 --> 00:04:09,602
"H-O gauge railroading.
75
00:04:09,604 --> 00:04:13,174
Half the size of O-gauge,
but twice the fun."
76
00:04:13,176 --> 00:04:16,522
Very controversial topic.
77
00:04:16,524 --> 00:04:18,398
Which side do you come down on?
78
00:04:18,400 --> 00:04:20,551
I'll let you know after tonight.
79
00:04:20,553 --> 00:04:23,196
Unlike some people,
I'm going in with an open mind.
80
00:04:23,198 --> 00:04:25,178
Who am I kidding?
81
00:04:25,180 --> 00:04:28,357
Of course we all know
it's O-gauge or no gauge.
82
00:04:28,359 --> 00:04:32,402
Can you believe grown men sit
around and play with toy trains?
83
00:04:32,404 --> 00:04:34,715
That's pretty big talk
for a man
84
00:04:34,717 --> 00:04:37,828
with a closet full of magic
tricks at his mother's house.
85
00:04:39,691 --> 00:04:42,045
First of all, they're not
tricks, they're illusions.
86
00:04:42,047 --> 00:04:44,252
And...
87
00:04:44,254 --> 00:04:46,750
secondly, when we get
married, they're all going up
88
00:04:46,752 --> 00:04:49,550
in the attic so you can have
that closet for clothes.
89
00:04:49,552 --> 00:04:52,699
Why would I keep clothes
at your mother's house?
90
00:04:52,701 --> 00:04:54,055
Well, don't think
of it that way.
91
00:04:54,057 --> 00:04:56,315
Once we move in,
it'll be our house.
92
00:04:56,317 --> 00:04:57,878
Is she moving out?
93
00:04:57,880 --> 00:04:59,146
Why would
she move out?
94
00:04:59,148 --> 00:05:00,907
It's her house.
95
00:05:00,909 --> 00:05:03,310
Hang on.
96
00:05:03,312 --> 00:05:06,438
You seriously think I'm going
to live with your mother?
97
00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:08,103
Howard, I think
I can help here.
98
00:05:08,105 --> 00:05:10,805
Yes, Bernadette,
that's exactly what he thinks.
99
00:05:10,807 --> 00:05:11,972
Why not?
100
00:05:11,974 --> 00:05:13,936
It's a great house,
plenty of room,
101
00:05:13,938 --> 00:05:16,208
and if we have kids,
Mom's there to help.
102
00:05:16,210 --> 00:05:18,034
You know, when she tells "The
Three Little Pigs" story,
103
00:05:18,036 --> 00:05:21,761
she actually has hair
on her chinny-chin-chin.
104
00:05:21,763 --> 00:05:24,285
I'm not gonna live
with your mother.
105
00:05:24,287 --> 00:05:27,129
Not now, not ever.
106
00:05:27,131 --> 00:05:30,581
Wow, someone obviously
has some mommy issues.
107
00:05:32,784 --> 00:05:34,411
Raj, take me home.
108
00:05:34,413 --> 00:05:36,689
Don't listen to her.
Go to the movie theater.
109
00:05:36,691 --> 00:05:38,138
Take me home now.
110
00:05:38,140 --> 00:05:39,134
Movie theater!
111
00:05:39,136 --> 00:05:40,171
(groans)
112
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:42,720
Okay, everybody
calm down.
113
00:05:42,722 --> 00:05:44,358
There is a simple
solution here.
114
00:05:44,360 --> 00:05:46,027
Raj, take me to the train store,
115
00:05:46,029 --> 00:05:48,162
and then I don't care
what you people do.
116
00:05:55,561 --> 00:05:57,194
How was your shower?
117
00:05:57,196 --> 00:06:00,727
It was good, good.
118
00:06:00,729 --> 00:06:03,845
Just out of curiosity, what time
do you usually go to bed?
119
00:06:03,847 --> 00:06:05,155
Oh, I'm up all night.
120
00:06:05,157 --> 00:06:06,783
I'm like a possum.
121
00:06:08,886 --> 00:06:11,680
Boy, you were not liked
in high school, were you?
122
00:06:11,682 --> 00:06:13,215
Not really.
123
00:06:13,217 --> 00:06:15,089
Is that my yearbook?
Mm-hmm.
124
00:06:15,091 --> 00:06:17,161
"Dear Leonard,
you're really good at science.
125
00:06:17,163 --> 00:06:20,808
Maybe one day you'll come up
with a cure for being a dork."
126
00:06:20,810 --> 00:06:23,485
Well, it wasn't spray-painting
a lightning bolt
127
00:06:23,487 --> 00:06:26,522
on my briefcase,
I can tell you that.
128
00:06:26,524 --> 00:06:28,069
If it makes you feel any better,
129
00:06:28,071 --> 00:06:30,349
the only person who signed
my yearbook was my mother.
130
00:06:30,351 --> 00:06:32,210
Aw.
"Dear Amy,
131
00:06:32,212 --> 00:06:34,577
"Self-respect and a hymen
are better than friends and fun.
132
00:06:34,579 --> 00:06:35,912
Love, Mom."
133
00:06:37,705 --> 00:06:40,455
Well, you can add
Jerry's Junction
134
00:06:40,457 --> 00:06:42,148
to the list of train stores
135
00:06:42,150 --> 00:06:45,481
Sheldon Cooper will never
set foot in again.
136
00:06:45,483 --> 00:06:48,153
Rough night, Casey Jones?
137
00:06:48,155 --> 00:06:49,887
You don't know
the half of it.
138
00:06:49,889 --> 00:06:51,304
It was billed
139
00:06:51,306 --> 00:06:54,372
as a lively give-and-take on
the merits of model train sizes.
140
00:06:54,374 --> 00:06:56,836
But it was actually a setup
to intimidate
141
00:06:56,838 --> 00:07:00,208
weak-minded spineless rubes
into buying H-O starter sets.
142
00:07:00,210 --> 00:07:01,522
What's in the bag?
143
00:07:01,524 --> 00:07:04,897
I don't want to talk about it.
144
00:07:04,899 --> 00:07:07,755
But it's not a spine,
I'll tell you that.
145
00:07:07,757 --> 00:07:10,424
Well, I had a delightful
evening, Leonard.
146
00:07:10,426 --> 00:07:11,812
We should do this
again sometime.
147
00:07:11,814 --> 00:07:13,610
Ah, sure.
That'd be nice.
148
00:07:13,612 --> 00:07:14,943
Glad to hear it.
149
00:07:14,945 --> 00:07:16,794
I need someone to accompany me
to the wedding
150
00:07:16,796 --> 00:07:18,892
of Dr. Moranelli
and Dr. Gustufson this Friday.
151
00:07:18,894 --> 00:07:20,565
They're kind of
the Brad and Angelina
152
00:07:20,567 --> 00:07:22,563
of the primatology department.
153
00:07:22,565 --> 00:07:23,954
Wouldn't you rather
bring Sheldon?
154
00:07:23,956 --> 00:07:27,386
I would, but the last wedding
we went to was a disaster.
155
00:07:27,388 --> 00:07:29,898
He behaved like a child
the entire time.
156
00:07:29,900 --> 00:07:31,256
Not my fault.
157
00:07:31,258 --> 00:07:34,247
You said there'd be
other scientists there my age.
158
00:07:37,989 --> 00:07:39,908
Doesn't matter.
You're out, he's in.
159
00:07:39,910 --> 00:07:42,257
No date to the prom,
two dates to a wedding.
160
00:07:42,259 --> 00:07:45,144
Hmm, how times change.
161
00:07:48,465 --> 00:07:51,154
(singsongy):
Ha-ha, you have to go
to a wedding.
162
00:07:54,786 --> 00:07:56,406
(doorbell rings)
163
00:07:56,408 --> 00:07:57,159
WOLOWITZ:
I'll get it!
164
00:07:57,161 --> 00:07:58,597
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
Could you get it?!
165
00:07:58,599 --> 00:07:59,918
I just said
I'm getting it!
166
00:07:59,920 --> 00:08:01,410
Fine, I'll get it!
167
00:08:01,412 --> 00:08:03,831
I got it!
168
00:08:04,786 --> 00:08:06,636
Oh, hi.
169
00:08:06,638 --> 00:08:07,807
Hey.
170
00:08:07,809 --> 00:08:09,335
I don't want to fight.
171
00:08:09,337 --> 00:08:11,482
I was just surprised
when you sprung
172
00:08:11,484 --> 00:08:13,336
the whole living-with-your-mom
stuff on me.
173
00:08:13,338 --> 00:08:17,624
Yeah, well, I'm sorry I
didn't run it by you first.
174
00:08:17,626 --> 00:08:19,884
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
I don't know who
you're talking to,
175
00:08:19,886 --> 00:08:20,842
but in or out!
176
00:08:20,844 --> 00:08:24,076
We don't need bugs!
177
00:08:24,078 --> 00:08:26,180
The bugs
only come here
178
00:08:26,182 --> 00:08:28,189
because you're
their queen!
179
00:08:31,147 --> 00:08:33,464
Listen, how about this.
180
00:08:33,466 --> 00:08:35,356
Before we make any
kind of decision
181
00:08:35,358 --> 00:08:37,690
about where we live,
we have a trial run.
182
00:08:37,692 --> 00:08:39,706
Stay here for a weekend,
see what it's like.
183
00:08:39,708 --> 00:08:41,648
And your mom would be
okay with that?
184
00:08:41,650 --> 00:08:43,027
Sure she would.
185
00:08:43,029 --> 00:08:45,614
Ma, do you mind if Bernadette
stays here this weekend?!
186
00:08:45,616 --> 00:08:48,214
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
Hey, if she's willing to
give the milk away for free,
187
00:08:48,216 --> 00:08:50,351
who am I to say no?!
188
00:08:52,757 --> 00:08:55,720
See? She's
good with it.
189
00:08:55,722 --> 00:08:58,170
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
Frankly, after all
your sleepovers
190
00:08:58,172 --> 00:09:01,743
with the little brown boy,
a girl is a big relief!
191
00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:15,600
All this years, I've been
so wrong.
192
00:09:17,189 --> 00:09:20,989
The tinier the train,
the more concentrated the fun.
193
00:09:25,104 --> 00:09:26,939
You're a brain scientist.
194
00:09:26,941 --> 00:09:29,025
Can you explain to me
why a brilliant man
195
00:09:29,027 --> 00:09:30,424
likes playing
with toy trains?
196
00:09:30,426 --> 00:09:32,935
Not without cutting
his head open, no.
197
00:09:34,592 --> 00:09:36,915
How about making my
eyes like Cleopatra?
198
00:09:36,917 --> 00:09:38,896
Really? For a wedding?
199
00:09:38,898 --> 00:09:40,307
Perhaps you're right.
200
00:09:40,309 --> 00:09:41,905
My cheekbones and
beckoning pelvis
201
00:09:41,907 --> 00:09:44,306
already have a certain "hello
sailor" quality to them.
202
00:09:45,522 --> 00:09:47,374
Ready.
203
00:09:47,376 --> 00:09:49,876
Aw.
204
00:09:49,878 --> 00:09:51,631
So handsome.
205
00:09:51,633 --> 00:09:53,749
Like James Bond.
206
00:09:53,751 --> 00:09:57,612
He's better than James Bond,
because he's tinier.
207
00:09:58,683 --> 00:10:01,146
I got you this
to give to me.
208
00:10:01,148 --> 00:10:04,397
Oh, sweetie,
guests don't normally
209
00:10:04,399 --> 00:10:05,814
wear corsages to a wedding.
210
00:10:05,816 --> 00:10:07,411
That's more of a prom thing.
211
00:10:07,413 --> 00:10:08,701
I never went to my prom.
212
00:10:08,703 --> 00:10:10,493
My mom paid my cousin
to take me,
213
00:10:10,495 --> 00:10:13,464
but he just used the money
to buy drugs.
214
00:10:13,466 --> 00:10:15,825
Put the corsage on her.
215
00:10:18,327 --> 00:10:21,675
Amy, this is for you.
216
00:10:21,677 --> 00:10:25,214
When you're done copping a
feel, that goes on my wrist.
217
00:10:28,445 --> 00:10:29,925
(high-pitched):
All aboard!
218
00:10:29,927 --> 00:10:32,594
Woo-woo!
219
00:10:32,596 --> 00:10:34,305
(normal voice):
It's official.
220
00:10:34,307 --> 00:10:36,493
I'm an H-O trainiac.
221
00:10:39,819 --> 00:10:42,741
So, dinner
went nice.
222
00:10:42,743 --> 00:10:44,642
Yeah. Yeah, I guess.
223
00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:49,365
Does your mother always
cut your meat for you?
224
00:10:49,367 --> 00:10:52,543
Only when it's fatty.
225
00:10:54,039 --> 00:10:55,664
Well, don't be jealous, babe.
226
00:10:55,666 --> 00:10:58,056
Someday you'll get to cut it
for me.
227
00:10:58,058 --> 00:10:59,860
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
Bernadette!
228
00:10:59,862 --> 00:11:03,672
I found the extra head for the
Waterpik if you want to use it!
229
00:11:03,674 --> 00:11:06,138
I'm okay, Mrs. Wolowitz.
230
00:11:06,140 --> 00:11:07,444
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
You sure?!
231
00:11:07,446 --> 00:11:11,003
I just squirted half a
brisket outta my teeth!
232
00:11:11,005 --> 00:11:13,853
Hey, Ma, how about
a little privacy?!
233
00:11:13,855 --> 00:11:16,073
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
Oh, I know what that means!
234
00:11:16,075 --> 00:11:17,864
Hubba-hubba!
235
00:11:17,866 --> 00:11:20,016
Oh, God.
236
00:11:20,018 --> 00:11:22,190
Relax, it'll be fine.
237
00:11:22,192 --> 00:11:23,874
Okay.
238
00:11:23,876 --> 00:11:26,378
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
Let me know when
you're done canoodling!
239
00:11:26,380 --> 00:11:28,674
Mommy needs a foot rub!
240
00:11:32,575 --> 00:11:34,577
¶ ¶
241
00:11:45,505 --> 00:11:47,329
Would you like to dance?
242
00:11:47,331 --> 00:11:48,849
No, thank you.
243
00:11:48,851 --> 00:11:50,668
I'm really not
much of a dancer.
244
00:11:51,730 --> 00:11:53,727
You're not exactly
winning any trophies
245
00:11:53,729 --> 00:11:55,636
as a conversationalist, either.
246
00:11:57,998 --> 00:12:00,523
I'm sorry.
247
00:12:00,525 --> 00:12:02,026
The bride and groom
seem happy.
248
00:12:02,028 --> 00:12:03,624
AMY:
Why shouldn't they be?
249
00:12:03,626 --> 00:12:05,344
They have a feverish night of
250
00:12:05,346 --> 00:12:07,347
socially-approved
copulation ahead of them.
251
00:12:09,527 --> 00:12:11,899
In some cultures, we'd stand
outside of their bedroom
252
00:12:11,901 --> 00:12:13,878
cheering as they
achieved orgasm.
253
00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:16,213
That sounds like
a late night,
254
00:12:16,215 --> 00:12:18,889
and I have work in
the morning, so...
255
00:12:18,891 --> 00:12:21,334
Leonard, you may
not have noticed,
256
00:12:21,336 --> 00:12:23,606
but I am being
a delight here.
257
00:12:24,985 --> 00:12:27,408
And you're not holding up
your end of the evening.
258
00:12:27,410 --> 00:12:29,931
Oh, sorry. This wedding
just reminds me
259
00:12:29,933 --> 00:12:33,512
of my kinda-sorta girlfriend
9,000 miles away.
260
00:12:33,514 --> 00:12:36,371
I have a kinda-sorta boyfriend
who's playing with a model train
261
00:12:36,373 --> 00:12:39,119
right now, you don't hear me
bitching about it.
262
00:12:42,657 --> 00:12:44,689
Leonard, a word of advice--
moody self-obsession
263
00:12:44,691 --> 00:12:47,142
is only attractive in men
who can play guitar
264
00:12:47,144 --> 00:12:49,436
and are considerably
taller than you.
265
00:12:49,438 --> 00:12:51,139
I'm not moody.
266
00:12:51,141 --> 00:12:52,444
I'm fun.
267
00:12:52,446 --> 00:12:55,350
You have any evidence
to support that statement?
268
00:12:55,352 --> 00:12:58,254
Well, hey, I'm just as
much fun as you are.
269
00:12:58,256 --> 00:13:01,072
Really? Are you willing to draw
a mustache on your finger
270
00:13:01,074 --> 00:13:03,859
as a conversational icebreaker?
271
00:13:03,861 --> 00:13:06,415
I am.
272
00:13:08,554 --> 00:13:11,101
Okay, fine, what
do you suggest?
273
00:13:11,103 --> 00:13:12,848
¶ ¶
274
00:13:12,850 --> 00:13:14,739
We just had a lovely meal,
275
00:13:14,741 --> 00:13:18,610
the band... is on fire...
276
00:13:18,612 --> 00:13:20,566
and you're sitting
next to a beautiful woman
277
00:13:20,568 --> 00:13:22,131
wearing whorish makeup.
278
00:13:23,624 --> 00:13:25,655
Why don't we head out
on the dance floor
279
00:13:25,657 --> 00:13:28,036
and see if I can sweat
through these dress shields.
280
00:13:28,038 --> 00:13:31,330
Once again, I-I'm really
not much of a dancer.
281
00:13:31,332 --> 00:13:32,839
Don't worry...
282
00:13:32,841 --> 00:13:35,639
I'll lead.
283
00:13:35,641 --> 00:13:37,687
("The Chicken Dance" playing)
284
00:14:00,016 --> 00:14:03,031
(imitating lightsaber)
285
00:14:06,439 --> 00:14:07,683
Howard?
286
00:14:07,685 --> 00:14:10,206
(imitates lightsaber
turning off)
287
00:14:10,208 --> 00:14:12,017
Ready for bed?
288
00:14:12,019 --> 00:14:14,532
No. I need to brush my teeth,
but your mother's
289
00:14:14,534 --> 00:14:16,678
been in the bathroom
for, like, an hour.
Oh.
290
00:14:16,680 --> 00:14:21,185
Yeah, she sometimes has problems
doing her business. Hang on.
291
00:14:21,187 --> 00:14:22,569
Ma, give up!
292
00:14:22,571 --> 00:14:25,539
Tonight's
not your night!
293
00:14:25,541 --> 00:14:28,684
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
You don't know that!
I just sat down!
294
00:14:28,686 --> 00:14:30,596
WOLOWITZ:
Come on, take a break!
295
00:14:30,598 --> 00:14:32,804
Bernadette needs
to brush her teeth!
296
00:14:32,806 --> 00:14:34,749
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
She can come in
and brush her teeth!
297
00:14:34,751 --> 00:14:37,717
I'm not embarrassed!
298
00:14:37,719 --> 00:14:39,852
Problem solved.
299
00:14:41,485 --> 00:14:44,205
No, it's not.
I'm not going in there.
300
00:14:44,207 --> 00:14:45,402
Oh, come on, honey.
301
00:14:45,404 --> 00:14:47,477
She's just sitting in there
reading a magazine.
302
00:14:47,479 --> 00:14:48,729
You can't see anything.
303
00:14:48,731 --> 00:14:50,623
I go in all the time.
304
00:14:50,625 --> 00:14:52,112
(chuckles)
305
00:14:52,114 --> 00:14:55,234
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
Ha! The eagle has landed!
306
00:14:55,236 --> 00:14:57,115
(toilet flushing)
307
00:14:58,436 --> 00:15:01,240
And we have splashdown.
308
00:15:01,242 --> 00:15:03,007
(clears throat)
309
00:15:03,009 --> 00:15:06,223
Wait here, I'm gonna
go light a candle.
310
00:15:06,225 --> 00:15:09,715
And then we make
passionate love.
311
00:15:15,848 --> 00:15:17,518
There we go, last floor.
312
00:15:17,520 --> 00:15:19,278
I just can't figure
out what happened.
313
00:15:19,280 --> 00:15:22,283
I put my left leg in,
I took my left leg out,
314
00:15:22,285 --> 00:15:26,427
I put my left leg in, and
something just snapped.
315
00:15:26,429 --> 00:15:29,483
The hokey pokey
is a young man's game.
316
00:15:29,485 --> 00:15:31,930
(chuckles)
I did have a great time.
317
00:15:31,932 --> 00:15:33,275
Thank you for reminding me
318
00:15:33,277 --> 00:15:35,612
it's okay to have fun
once in a while.
319
00:15:35,614 --> 00:15:37,159
You're welcome.
320
00:15:37,161 --> 00:15:39,380
And also for breaking
the head off the ice swan
321
00:15:39,382 --> 00:15:41,270
so I could hold it against
my pulled groin.
322
00:15:41,272 --> 00:15:42,799
I excel
323
00:15:42,801 --> 00:15:45,945
at spatial reasoning, and I had
a hunch that the graceful slope
324
00:15:45,947 --> 00:15:48,420
of its neck would cradle
your genitals nicely.
325
00:15:49,811 --> 00:15:53,063
Well, okay.
Again, thank you.
326
00:15:53,065 --> 00:15:55,507
And again, you're welcome.
327
00:15:56,563 --> 00:15:58,997
Want to come in,
have a cup of tea?
328
00:15:58,999 --> 00:16:00,506
No, thanks.
I'm gonna head home.
329
00:16:00,508 --> 00:16:02,821
'Kay. Well, good night.
330
00:16:02,823 --> 00:16:05,275
Good night.
331
00:16:11,199 --> 00:16:13,803
Ames, hi.
How was the wedding?
332
00:16:13,805 --> 00:16:18,422
Great. Until I accidentally made
Leonard fall in love with me.
333
00:16:20,953 --> 00:16:22,775
Come in, let's talk.
334
00:16:24,065 --> 00:16:26,405
Do you want a
glass of wine?
335
00:16:26,407 --> 00:16:28,868
Wine is one of the reasons
I'm in this fix.
336
00:16:28,870 --> 00:16:30,151
That and this dang pelvis.
337
00:16:32,447 --> 00:16:35,128
Okay, I'm sorry,
what exactly happened?
338
00:16:35,130 --> 00:16:37,388
The inevitable--
he was lonely and vulnerable
339
00:16:37,390 --> 00:16:38,854
from missing his girlfriend,
340
00:16:38,856 --> 00:16:40,091
while I was charming,
341
00:16:40,093 --> 00:16:42,189
supportive and,
let's face it, in this dress,
342
00:16:42,191 --> 00:16:45,843
the perfect combination
of Madonna and whore.
343
00:16:45,845 --> 00:16:48,592
Oh, God,
did he make a move on you?
344
00:16:48,594 --> 00:16:50,333
No, but it's only
a matter of time.
345
00:16:50,335 --> 00:16:53,019
How could I have not
seen this coming?
346
00:16:53,021 --> 00:16:57,115
Now I'm gonna have to break
the little sad sack's heart.
347
00:16:57,117 --> 00:16:59,944
Yeah, I'm sure he'll be okay.
Oh, Penny,
348
00:16:59,946 --> 00:17:02,687
much as I would treasure
knowing that the two of us had
349
00:17:02,689 --> 00:17:04,377
been defiled by the same man,
350
00:17:04,379 --> 00:17:06,205
Leonard just doesn't get
my motor running.
351
00:17:10,036 --> 00:17:11,826
So, um, what are
you gonna do?
352
00:17:11,828 --> 00:17:14,700
Do you want me to talk
to Leonard, let him down easy?
353
00:17:14,702 --> 00:17:17,050
No. I'll let him have tonight.
354
00:17:17,052 --> 00:17:18,144
Then in the morning,
355
00:17:18,146 --> 00:17:19,981
I'll send him an e-mail
letting him know
356
00:17:19,983 --> 00:17:22,376
this body is never
gonna be his wonderland.
357
00:17:23,956 --> 00:17:27,016
I mean, frankly, you've got
a better shot than he does.
358
00:17:37,043 --> 00:17:38,358
Leonard.
359
00:17:38,360 --> 00:17:39,840
Check it out.
360
00:17:39,842 --> 00:17:42,058
I bought an N-gauge locomotive.
361
00:17:42,060 --> 00:17:44,125
Half the size of H-O.
362
00:17:44,127 --> 00:17:47,761
Look, it fits in my mouth.
363
00:17:47,763 --> 00:17:50,064
Sounds like you
had a great night.
364
00:17:50,066 --> 00:17:52,161
(muffled):
I did.
365
00:17:52,163 --> 00:17:54,940
How was yours?
Not bad. I had
a lot more fun
366
00:17:54,942 --> 00:17:56,893
with Amy than I
thought I would.
367
00:17:56,895 --> 00:17:59,186
What exactly
do you mean by that?
368
00:17:59,188 --> 00:18:00,769
Well, it turns out
she really knows
369
00:18:00,771 --> 00:18:03,461
how to help a guy loosen up
and have a good time.
370
00:18:03,463 --> 00:18:07,207
Although, truth be told, my
groin's a little worse for wear.
371
00:18:08,303 --> 00:18:10,426
Ow!
372
00:18:12,258 --> 00:18:14,261
Why did you do that?
373
00:18:14,263 --> 00:18:17,689
To send a message:
she is not for you.
374
00:18:17,691 --> 00:18:19,092
What?
375
00:18:19,094 --> 00:18:20,423
Not for you!
376
00:18:34,864 --> 00:18:37,637
Good morning, handsome.
377
00:18:37,639 --> 00:18:40,202
Morning, Mom.
378
00:18:41,575 --> 00:18:43,409
It's me.
379
00:18:45,743 --> 00:18:49,211
Yes, it is, and you're
so pretty in the morning.
380
00:18:51,048 --> 00:18:53,070
Your mom and I
made you breakfast.
381
00:18:53,072 --> 00:18:54,456
(laughs)
Oh, wow.
382
00:18:54,458 --> 00:18:56,623
So you guys are getting along?
383
00:18:56,625 --> 00:18:58,244
Yeah, I guess.
384
00:18:58,246 --> 00:19:00,015
We're very different
people, Howard,
385
00:19:00,017 --> 00:19:02,928
so communication's
a little tricky.
386
00:19:02,930 --> 00:19:04,752
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
Does he like the pancakes?!
387
00:19:04,754 --> 00:19:06,901
He didn't try them yet!
388
00:19:09,444 --> 00:19:11,249
Is there any butter?
389
00:19:11,251 --> 00:19:13,270
It's butter-flavored syrup.
Oh.
390
00:19:13,272 --> 00:19:14,924
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
So, what's the word?!
391
00:19:14,926 --> 00:19:16,961
He wants butter!
392
00:19:18,415 --> 00:19:20,671
MRS. WOLOWITZ:
It's butter-flavored syrup
393
00:19:20,673 --> 00:19:23,241
I just told him that!
394
00:19:28,647 --> 00:19:30,677
I don't need any butter.
395
00:19:30,679 --> 00:19:33,924
If you want butter,
I'll get you butter.
396
00:19:37,689 --> 00:19:39,649
Well, I guess
I'll cut these by myself.
397
00:19:39,651 --> 00:19:42,694
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398
00:19:42,696 --> 00:19:45,821
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399
00:20:24,951 --> 00:20:25,866
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