1
00:00:00,495 --> 00:00:02,779
You feel like trying
something new for dinner?
2
00:00:02,780 --> 00:00:05,081
Maybe Indian, Tex-Mex?
3
00:00:05,083 --> 00:00:07,217
You ever wonder how
humans would be different
4
00:00:07,219 --> 00:00:10,420
if they evolved from lizards
instead of mammals?
5
00:00:12,456 --> 00:00:14,674
Okay, let's talk
about that.
6
00:00:16,093 --> 00:00:18,812
As you know, lizards--
cold-blooded animals--
7
00:00:18,814 --> 00:00:20,897
lack the ability to
sense temperature.
8
00:00:20,899 --> 00:00:23,817
But they do move more
sluggishly when it's cold.
9
00:00:23,819 --> 00:00:26,486
So, lizard weathermen
would say things like,
10
00:00:26,488 --> 00:00:29,772
"Bring a sweater,
it's slow outside."
11
00:00:31,775 --> 00:00:34,861
I love my mind.
12
00:00:34,863 --> 00:00:36,412
We all do.
13
00:00:36,414 --> 00:00:37,813
Now, how about dinner?
14
00:00:37,815 --> 00:00:42,035
Oh, I would assume we'd enjoy
insects or smaller lizards.
15
00:00:42,037 --> 00:00:44,037
We could also pull each other's
tails off and grill them;
16
00:00:44,039 --> 00:00:46,039
they'll just grow back.
17
00:00:48,759 --> 00:00:49,825
Oh!
18
00:00:49,827 --> 00:00:53,713
My life-size cardboard
Mr. Spock is here!
19
00:00:53,715 --> 00:00:57,350
I know he wouldn't care for
an outburst of human emotion,
20
00:00:57,352 --> 00:01:00,186
but, oh, goodie, oh,
goodie, oh, goodie.
21
00:01:01,505 --> 00:01:06,676
Commander Spock requesting
permission to be unfolded.
22
00:01:06,678 --> 00:01:07,677
Excuse me.
23
00:01:07,679 --> 00:01:10,179
Permission granted, Commander.
24
00:01:11,782 --> 00:01:14,367
Which is why the more
intelligent the monkey,
25
00:01:14,369 --> 00:01:16,986
the more feces they fling.
26
00:01:18,489 --> 00:01:20,456
Excuse me, Amy.
27
00:01:20,458 --> 00:01:22,492
Penny, do you have plans
for dinner tonight?
28
00:01:22,494 --> 00:01:23,859
Why, you guys going somewhere?
29
00:01:23,861 --> 00:01:24,994
No, I mean just you and me.
30
00:01:24,996 --> 00:01:28,248
You mean, like a date?
31
00:01:28,250 --> 00:01:30,166
Not like a date, a date.
32
00:01:30,168 --> 00:01:34,337
Ooh...!
Ooh...!
33
00:01:34,339 --> 00:01:38,341
Um... o-okay.
34
00:01:38,343 --> 00:01:39,342
Sure.
35
00:01:39,344 --> 00:01:42,979
Ooh...!
Ooh...!
36
00:01:42,981 --> 00:01:44,230
Oh, no!
37
00:01:44,232 --> 00:01:47,283
They sent the wrong Spock!
38
00:01:48,402 --> 00:01:52,021
Live long and suck it,
Zachary Quinto.
39
00:01:52,022 --> 00:01:54,222
The Big Bang Theory 5x13
The Recombination Hypothesis
Original Air Date on January 19, 2012
40
00:01:54,223 --> 00:01:56,223
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
41
00:01:56,264 --> 00:01:58,382
This is so exciting.
42
00:01:58,384 --> 00:02:00,050
If Leonard and Penny
get back together,
43
00:02:00,052 --> 00:02:02,269
Howard and I can go on
double dates with them.
44
00:02:02,271 --> 00:02:06,223
How come you never invite
Sheldon and me on a double date?
45
00:02:06,225 --> 00:02:09,559
Mm, uh...
46
00:02:09,561 --> 00:02:11,545
How's it going
in there, Penny?!
47
00:02:11,547 --> 00:02:13,547
Just a sec.
48
00:02:14,399 --> 00:02:17,401
Too much?
49
00:02:17,403 --> 00:02:19,569
Yes.
No.
50
00:02:21,139 --> 00:02:24,074
Okay, just hang on.
51
00:02:24,076 --> 00:02:27,878
You just can't handle
her raw sexuality, can you?
52
00:02:27,880 --> 00:02:30,997
When did you and Leonard
break up?
53
00:02:30,999 --> 00:02:32,766
Uh, about two years ago.
54
00:02:32,768 --> 00:02:35,051
Why do you think
he asked you out again?
55
00:02:35,053 --> 00:02:36,002
I don't know.
56
00:02:36,004 --> 00:02:37,237
Maybe he's dying.
57
00:02:37,239 --> 00:02:39,389
That would be so romantic.
58
00:02:39,391 --> 00:02:41,508
He's not dying.
59
00:02:41,510 --> 00:02:43,460
Too bad.
60
00:02:43,462 --> 00:02:45,962
If he were, she could just
throw him in bed
61
00:02:45,964 --> 00:02:49,116
and ride him
right up until he flatlines.
62
00:02:51,986 --> 00:02:54,654
How about this?
63
00:02:54,656 --> 00:02:57,674
Maybe.
Come on.
64
00:02:57,676 --> 00:03:00,527
Yeah, okay, no.
65
00:03:00,529 --> 00:03:02,662
Do you think
you'll sleep with him tonight?
66
00:03:02,664 --> 00:03:03,997
Absolutely not.
67
00:03:03,999 --> 00:03:05,332
Look, we're just
gonna have dinner
68
00:03:05,334 --> 00:03:07,117
and, you know,
see how it goes.
69
00:03:07,119 --> 00:03:09,369
If he were dying,
would you sleep with him?
70
00:03:09,371 --> 00:03:10,987
What?!
71
00:03:10,989 --> 00:03:12,622
Assuming he were
dying of something
72
00:03:12,624 --> 00:03:15,342
that couldn't be
sexually transmitted.
73
00:03:15,344 --> 00:03:18,795
You know, like a spear wound
to the head.
74
00:03:18,797 --> 00:03:20,430
Okay, he is not dying.
75
00:03:20,432 --> 00:03:23,099
How do you know?
Are you a doctor?
76
00:03:23,101 --> 00:03:25,318
You can make-believe, though.
77
00:03:25,320 --> 00:03:28,472
Sometimes Howard and I pretend
that his arrhythmia is acting up
78
00:03:28,474 --> 00:03:30,173
and I'm a sexy cardiologist.
79
00:03:30,175 --> 00:03:35,395
And the naughty part is
I'm not in his HMO network.
80
00:03:37,148 --> 00:03:40,066
Screw it. I'm not gonna
make a big deal out of this.
81
00:03:40,068 --> 00:03:41,568
It's just dinner.
82
00:03:41,570 --> 00:03:43,286
With a dead man.
83
00:03:44,856 --> 00:03:46,823
Amy, stop it.
84
00:03:46,825 --> 00:03:48,208
Oh, God, I'm so nervous.
85
00:03:48,210 --> 00:03:49,493
Relax.
86
00:03:49,495 --> 00:03:51,578
You know Leonard's
always been crazy about you.
87
00:03:51,580 --> 00:03:52,796
It's gonna be great.
88
00:03:52,798 --> 00:03:54,414
I know, but we've finally
gotten to a place
89
00:03:54,416 --> 00:03:56,049
where we can hang out
without it being weird.
90
00:03:56,051 --> 00:03:58,051
And what if something
goes wrong? Then what?
91
00:03:58,053 --> 00:03:59,820
Guess it'll just
be Sheldon and me
92
00:03:59,822 --> 00:04:02,672
going on a double date
with Howard and Bernadette.
93
00:04:02,674 --> 00:04:06,393
Sure, we'd love that.
94
00:04:06,395 --> 00:04:10,096
Change your clothes;
we got a lot riding on this.
95
00:04:15,069 --> 00:04:17,070
Mm...
96
00:04:17,072 --> 00:04:19,623
I want to build a road,
97
00:04:19,625 --> 00:04:22,725
but I need wood.
98
00:04:22,727 --> 00:04:24,961
Do either of you fellows
have wood?
99
00:04:31,252 --> 00:04:33,470
I don't understand the laughter.
100
00:04:34,805 --> 00:04:36,239
The object of Settlers of Catan
101
00:04:36,241 --> 00:04:38,258
is to build roads
and settlements.
102
00:04:38,260 --> 00:04:39,709
To do so requires wood.
103
00:04:39,711 --> 00:04:43,230
Now, I have sheep; I need wood.
104
00:04:45,149 --> 00:04:47,267
Who has wood for my sheep?
105
00:04:50,254 --> 00:04:52,889
Okay, how do I look?
106
00:04:52,891 --> 00:04:55,559
More to the point, why
are you doing this?
107
00:04:55,561 --> 00:04:56,476
What are you talking about?
108
00:04:56,478 --> 00:04:57,944
Did you forget
what Penny did to you?
109
00:04:57,946 --> 00:05:00,196
It took you two years
and defiling my sister
110
00:05:00,198 --> 00:05:02,765
to turn that frown upside down.
111
00:05:02,767 --> 00:05:06,102
I didn't defile your sister,
we had a relationship.
112
00:05:06,104 --> 00:05:09,639
I heard you call her
Brown Sugar.
113
00:05:09,641 --> 00:05:12,475
In my book,
that's defilement.
114
00:05:12,477 --> 00:05:14,010
You want to know my opinion?
115
00:05:14,012 --> 00:05:16,446
Oh, boy, do I!
116
00:05:16,448 --> 00:05:18,615
Sarcasm?
117
00:05:18,617 --> 00:05:20,951
No.
118
00:05:20,953 --> 00:05:23,253
All right, then.
119
00:05:24,488 --> 00:05:25,955
The reason you're fixated on
120
00:05:25,957 --> 00:05:28,675
a good-natured simpleton
like Penny is that
121
00:05:28,677 --> 00:05:32,095
she's the exact opposite of
your first romantic attachment:
122
00:05:32,097 --> 00:05:34,064
your brilliant
yet intimidating mother.
123
00:05:34,066 --> 00:05:36,316
Where on earth
did you get that from?
124
00:05:36,318 --> 00:05:39,686
It's in her book,
Needy Baby, Greedy Baby.
125
00:05:41,522 --> 00:05:43,806
That doesn't make it true.
126
00:05:43,808 --> 00:05:46,526
It's called nonfiction
for a reason, Leonard.
127
00:05:46,528 --> 00:05:48,795
See you later.
128
00:05:49,664 --> 00:05:51,448
If they ever make
a movie version
129
00:05:51,450 --> 00:05:54,034
of that book, you know who
should play Leonard's mother?
130
00:05:54,036 --> 00:05:55,719
Sandra Bullock.
131
00:05:56,337 --> 00:05:57,587
Why?
132
00:05:57,589 --> 00:06:01,441
Because she's great
in everything.
133
00:06:03,994 --> 00:06:06,296
Now, where were we?
134
00:06:06,298 --> 00:06:08,465
Oh, yes.
Does anyone have any wood?
135
00:06:09,518 --> 00:06:10,833
Oh, come on!
136
00:06:10,835 --> 00:06:12,636
I just want wood.
137
00:06:12,638 --> 00:06:14,437
Why are you making it so hard?
138
00:06:23,013 --> 00:06:25,848
So, do they have a name
for a first date
139
00:06:25,850 --> 00:06:27,734
with someone
you used to go out with?
140
00:06:27,736 --> 00:06:29,819
Oh, that's a good question.
141
00:06:29,821 --> 00:06:31,354
How about "awkward"?
142
00:06:31,356 --> 00:06:34,374
Yeah, that sounds right.
143
00:06:34,376 --> 00:06:36,159
Yeah?
144
00:06:36,161 --> 00:06:39,913
Hey, how about if we pretend
we're actually on a first date?
145
00:06:39,915 --> 00:06:41,197
See how that goes.
146
00:06:41,199 --> 00:06:42,215
Okay.
147
00:06:44,336 --> 00:06:46,886
So, Polly,
tell me about yourself.
148
00:06:47,923 --> 00:06:48,922
It's Penny.
149
00:06:48,924 --> 00:06:50,873
Oh, sorry, yeah.
Awkward.
150
00:06:53,211 --> 00:06:54,561
Okay, uh, let's see.
151
00:06:54,563 --> 00:06:57,814
I'm from Nebraska, and ever
since I was a little girl,
152
00:06:57,816 --> 00:07:00,400
I dreamed of moving to L.A.
and becoming a movie star.
153
00:07:00,402 --> 00:07:01,985
Anyway,
154
00:07:01,987 --> 00:07:04,771
after four years of acting
lessons and waiting tables,
155
00:07:04,773 --> 00:07:06,723
I've done
a hemorrhoid commercial
156
00:07:06,725 --> 00:07:09,409
and a production of Anne Frank
above a bowling alley.
157
00:07:10,529 --> 00:07:13,580
So, you know,
dreams do come true.
158
00:07:14,532 --> 00:07:15,498
Your turn.
159
00:07:15,500 --> 00:07:16,566
Uh, let's see.
160
00:07:17,753 --> 00:07:20,069
Uh, I am an experimental
physicist at Cal-Tech,
161
00:07:20,071 --> 00:07:23,339
most of my research is
with high-powered lasers,
162
00:07:23,341 --> 00:07:25,675
and, oh, I've just gotten
a big government grant
163
00:07:25,677 --> 00:07:28,011
to see if they can be used
to knock out
164
00:07:28,013 --> 00:07:29,129
incoming ballistic missiles.
165
00:07:29,131 --> 00:07:30,580
Wow. Can they?
166
00:07:30,582 --> 00:07:32,382
Oh, God, no.
167
00:07:35,919 --> 00:07:37,754
The money's pretty good.
168
00:07:38,939 --> 00:07:42,475
And I used the equipment
to make my own Bat-signal.
169
00:07:43,612 --> 00:07:44,778
Bat-signal?
170
00:07:44,780 --> 00:07:46,229
What are you, some kind of nerd?
171
00:07:46,231 --> 00:07:49,983
Not some kind of nerd,
I'm the king of the nerds.
172
00:07:53,821 --> 00:07:55,455
What does that mean?
173
00:07:55,457 --> 00:07:58,208
Uh, it means
if anyone displeases me,
174
00:07:58,210 --> 00:08:00,810
I don't help them
set up their printer.
175
00:08:02,497 --> 00:08:03,997
You are so funny.
176
00:08:03,999 --> 00:08:05,215
Good.
177
00:08:05,217 --> 00:08:07,133
Remember that
when I take my shirt off.
178
00:08:10,171 --> 00:08:11,221
Leonard, this is nice.
179
00:08:11,223 --> 00:08:12,505
I'm so glad we did this.
180
00:08:12,507 --> 00:08:13,606
Me, too.
181
00:08:15,726 --> 00:08:16,793
So what do you think?
182
00:08:16,795 --> 00:08:18,061
Are we gonna get back together?
183
00:08:18,063 --> 00:08:20,680
Whoa. Not so fast.
184
00:08:20,682 --> 00:08:22,532
I'm sorry, what did I say?
185
00:08:22,534 --> 00:08:26,269
Leonard, you know I will always
have feelings for you.
186
00:08:26,271 --> 00:08:27,821
Oh, God.
What?
187
00:08:27,823 --> 00:08:29,239
You said "always."
188
00:08:29,241 --> 00:08:30,807
You'll always have
feelings for me.
189
00:08:30,809 --> 00:08:31,741
So?
190
00:08:31,743 --> 00:08:33,276
So, that sounds more like
191
00:08:33,278 --> 00:08:35,195
something you'd say
if you didn't want
192
00:08:35,197 --> 00:08:36,329
a relationship with someone.
193
00:08:36,331 --> 00:08:37,747
"This isn't working out,
194
00:08:37,749 --> 00:08:39,532
but I'll always have
feelings for you."
195
00:08:39,534 --> 00:08:41,417
"I'm sorry I slept
with your best friend,
196
00:08:41,419 --> 00:08:43,319
but I'll always have
feelings for you."
197
00:08:43,321 --> 00:08:44,788
"Here's the thing, Lisa,
198
00:08:44,790 --> 00:08:48,541
I'm into dudes now, but I'll
always have feelings for you."
199
00:08:48,543 --> 00:08:50,927
How would you say it?
200
00:08:50,929 --> 00:08:52,829
I have feelings for you.
201
00:08:52,831 --> 00:08:54,130
It's the same thing.
No, it's not.
202
00:08:54,132 --> 00:08:55,498
"Always" made it worse.
203
00:08:55,500 --> 00:08:56,499
You're overthinking this.
204
00:08:56,501 --> 00:08:57,717
No, I'm not.
Yes, you are.
205
00:08:57,719 --> 00:08:59,135
You always overthink things.
206
00:08:59,137 --> 00:09:00,854
Th-There you go.
"Always" made it worse.
207
00:09:02,623 --> 00:09:06,009
See, this is where everything
goes wrong: when we talk.
208
00:09:06,011 --> 00:09:10,780
Well, I don't know how you have
a relationship without talking.
209
00:09:10,782 --> 00:09:12,282
Hey, I went out with this guy TJ
210
00:09:12,284 --> 00:09:13,650
for eight months,
we never talked.
211
00:09:13,652 --> 00:09:15,869
To this day, I don't even know
what TJ stands for.
212
00:09:15,871 --> 00:09:18,521
Wait, if you guys
didn't talk, what--
213
00:09:18,523 --> 00:09:20,290
Never mind, stupid question.
214
00:09:23,544 --> 00:09:27,530
And now that I have
some wood,
215
00:09:27,532 --> 00:09:31,801
I'm going to begin
the erection of my settlement.
216
00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:35,421
He's got to be
doing this on purpose.
217
00:09:38,893 --> 00:09:40,376
Ooh, 8:30.
218
00:09:40,378 --> 00:09:43,880
You and Penny decide to go out
and paint the town beige?
219
00:09:43,882 --> 00:09:47,049
You're 30 years old
and you live with your mother.
220
00:09:49,887 --> 00:09:51,888
I guess it didn't go well.
221
00:09:51,890 --> 00:09:53,423
We don't know that.
222
00:09:53,425 --> 00:09:54,574
Not to a certainty.
223
00:09:54,576 --> 00:09:57,327
All we know
is that Leonard is home.
224
00:10:00,248 --> 00:10:02,732
How about now?
225
00:10:02,734 --> 00:10:05,668
Again, not enough
evidence.
226
00:10:05,670 --> 00:10:08,705
For all we know,
he's being murdered.
227
00:10:10,708 --> 00:10:12,375
Now, back to our game.
228
00:10:12,377 --> 00:10:15,728
You were in the middle
of an erection.
229
00:10:18,866 --> 00:10:22,101
Oh, of course.
It's right here in my hand.
230
00:10:36,067 --> 00:10:38,618
What does she want from me now?
231
00:10:41,705 --> 00:10:44,274
What's up?
232
00:10:44,276 --> 00:10:46,776
Do not overthink this.
233
00:10:54,051 --> 00:10:57,136
I don't understand.
Bup-bup-bup-bup-bup-bup-bup.
234
00:10:57,138 --> 00:10:59,505
Okay, but earlier
it seemed like...
235
00:10:59,507 --> 00:11:01,724
No talking.
236
00:11:03,177 --> 00:11:05,962
Even during? 'Cause
sometimes I have questions.
237
00:11:14,754 --> 00:11:18,106
Well, that was fun.
238
00:11:18,108 --> 00:11:20,892
Yeah, except for when I got
the foot cramp.
239
00:11:20,894 --> 00:11:22,593
You hung in there, though.
240
00:11:22,595 --> 00:11:25,396
There was a lot at stake.
241
00:11:25,398 --> 00:11:28,132
So what do you
want to do now?
242
00:11:28,134 --> 00:11:30,718
Well, I want to go get
my asthma inhaler,
243
00:11:30,720 --> 00:11:32,920
but it might ruin the moment.
244
00:11:34,741 --> 00:11:37,742
Just, just
help me out here.
245
00:11:37,744 --> 00:11:40,411
How does a miserable date
end in sex?
246
00:11:40,413 --> 00:11:42,997
I don't know,
it's complicated.
247
00:11:42,999 --> 00:11:44,749
Well, I'm
a pretty smart guy,
248
00:11:44,751 --> 00:11:47,135
and right now my brain has
dibs on the blood supply,
249
00:11:47,137 --> 00:11:49,137
so give it a go.
250
00:11:49,139 --> 00:11:51,756
Okay, it's just,
251
00:11:51,758 --> 00:11:53,674
at the restaurant
when you said
252
00:11:53,676 --> 00:11:55,093
you wanted us to
be together again,
253
00:11:55,095 --> 00:11:59,914
it got very real very
fast and I panicked.
254
00:11:59,916 --> 00:12:01,149
Why?
255
00:12:01,151 --> 00:12:03,217
What are you
afraid of?
256
00:12:03,219 --> 00:12:04,936
Well, what if
we do go out
257
00:12:04,938 --> 00:12:07,522
and I do something stupid
and dump you again?
258
00:12:07,524 --> 00:12:08,823
What if I dump you?
259
00:12:13,245 --> 00:12:15,780
Come on, be serious.
260
00:12:15,782 --> 00:12:18,282
Well, how about
if we don't think
261
00:12:18,284 --> 00:12:20,251
about this
as a relationship?
262
00:12:20,253 --> 00:12:22,787
It could be more like
a new version of software.
263
00:12:22,789 --> 00:12:24,789
Penny and Leonard 2.0.
264
00:12:24,791 --> 00:12:27,308
We can test it internally,
shake out the bugs,
265
00:12:27,310 --> 00:12:29,110
and if we both feel
it's solid,
266
00:12:29,112 --> 00:12:31,796
then we'll roll it out
to the public.
267
00:12:31,798 --> 00:12:34,749
So we don't tell people
we're back together?
268
00:12:34,751 --> 00:12:35,716
Exactly.
269
00:12:35,718 --> 00:12:37,802
We pretend like our date
went badly.
270
00:12:37,804 --> 00:12:39,954
Well, we don't really
have to pretend.
271
00:12:39,956 --> 00:12:42,223
And we let them think
that we decided
272
00:12:42,225 --> 00:12:43,391
to just be friends
273
00:12:43,393 --> 00:12:45,309
and that everything's cool.
274
00:12:45,311 --> 00:12:46,844
Okay, great.
275
00:12:47,847 --> 00:12:50,014
Hey, I just remembered.
276
00:12:50,016 --> 00:12:52,299
I still got one
of your inhalers.
277
00:12:54,403 --> 00:12:56,604
I can't believe
you kept this.
278
00:12:56,606 --> 00:12:59,273
Yeah, I was gonna throw it
away, but I just couldn't.
279
00:12:59,275 --> 00:13:01,859
That is so sweet.
280
00:13:05,798 --> 00:13:08,132
In 25 to 30 minutes
I'm gonna show you
281
00:13:08,134 --> 00:13:10,735
how much
this means to me.
282
00:13:22,181 --> 00:13:22,830
Leonard?
283
00:13:22,832 --> 00:13:25,016
Yeah, hi, hi.
284
00:13:25,968 --> 00:13:27,935
How's it going?
285
00:13:27,937 --> 00:13:29,637
Uh, can't complain.
286
00:13:29,639 --> 00:13:31,606
Thanks for asking.
287
00:13:32,691 --> 00:13:35,810
Well, what were you doing out
at 3:00 in the morning?
288
00:13:35,812 --> 00:13:39,680
Well, uh, uh...
what are you doing up?
289
00:13:39,682 --> 00:13:42,283
I was using the bathroom.
290
00:13:42,285 --> 00:13:46,154
Yeah, well, so was I.
291
00:13:46,156 --> 00:13:48,289
Really?
292
00:13:48,291 --> 00:13:50,992
I didn't see you in there.
293
00:13:52,744 --> 00:13:56,914
Obviously... when I saw
that you were in ours,
294
00:13:56,916 --> 00:14:00,301
I went and used another one.
295
00:14:01,136 --> 00:14:04,005
Where?
296
00:14:04,007 --> 00:14:06,924
The, the gas station
across the street.
297
00:14:07,809 --> 00:14:09,877
In your pajamas?
298
00:14:09,879 --> 00:14:12,430
Yes.
299
00:14:12,432 --> 00:14:14,649
Without shoes?
300
00:14:15,901 --> 00:14:18,102
Yes.
301
00:14:18,887 --> 00:14:21,772
On a cold
winter's night?
302
00:14:23,609 --> 00:14:25,826
Yes.
303
00:14:28,614 --> 00:14:30,831
Seems unlikely.
304
00:14:30,833 --> 00:14:33,117
Did you bring
your asthma inhaler?
305
00:14:33,119 --> 00:14:36,504
Uh, uh, uh, yes, I did.
306
00:14:39,741 --> 00:14:41,959
Well, then,
I guess it's plausible.
307
00:14:43,045 --> 00:14:45,129
D-- hang on a
second, mister.
308
00:14:45,131 --> 00:14:46,347
What?
309
00:14:46,349 --> 00:14:51,068
After you used the facilities
at the gas station,
310
00:14:51,070 --> 00:14:52,436
did you make a purchase?
311
00:14:52,438 --> 00:14:54,138
What?
312
00:14:54,140 --> 00:14:56,724
It's customary, when
using the restroom
313
00:14:56,726 --> 00:15:00,194
at a retail establishment,
to make a small purchase.
314
00:15:00,196 --> 00:15:01,279
Did you?
315
00:15:01,281 --> 00:15:02,730
No.
316
00:15:04,100 --> 00:15:06,284
Here's two dollars.
317
00:15:09,071 --> 00:15:11,956
Go buy some beef jerky.
318
00:15:18,213 --> 00:15:21,449
I don't want beef jerky.
319
00:15:23,652 --> 00:15:25,586
It's not about you.
320
00:15:25,588 --> 00:15:28,139
It's about a poor immigrant
from Pakistan
321
00:15:28,141 --> 00:15:29,957
trying to make his way
in America
322
00:15:29,959 --> 00:15:31,392
by working the graveyard shift
323
00:15:31,394 --> 00:15:34,061
at the Colorado Boulevard
Chevron.
324
00:15:35,964 --> 00:15:38,149
Fine.
325
00:15:40,269 --> 00:15:43,237
Needy Baby, Greedy Baby indeed.
326
00:15:45,307 --> 00:15:46,907
Leonard will be here
in a moment.
327
00:15:46,909 --> 00:15:49,443
He's looking
for a different parking space.
328
00:15:49,445 --> 00:15:50,411
Why?
329
00:15:50,413 --> 00:15:51,779
We were next to a car
330
00:15:51,781 --> 00:15:54,365
with an "Ask me about my
grandchildren" bumper sticker,
331
00:15:54,367 --> 00:15:57,084
and I was afraid if we ran
into them on the way out,
332
00:15:57,086 --> 00:15:59,704
I'd be obligated
to do so.
333
00:16:00,989 --> 00:16:04,491
I'm so disappointed it didn't
work with him and Penny.
334
00:16:04,493 --> 00:16:06,160
Me, too.
335
00:16:06,162 --> 00:16:07,328
Out of deference
to them,
336
00:16:07,330 --> 00:16:10,798
let's not flaunt our
happy relationship.
337
00:16:10,800 --> 00:16:13,134
You have a keen insight
into the human heart,
338
00:16:13,136 --> 00:16:15,586
Amy Farrah Fowler.
339
00:16:16,805 --> 00:16:20,891
We are next to a Suburu with
a Gore/Lieberman bumper sticker.
340
00:16:20,893 --> 00:16:23,611
Well, I doubt they'd want to
talk about that, so we're fine.
341
00:16:25,113 --> 00:16:26,847
I'm surprised to see you here
342
00:16:26,849 --> 00:16:29,150
after it went
so badly with Penny.
343
00:16:29,152 --> 00:16:30,785
Well, hey, we're grown-ups.
344
00:16:30,787 --> 00:16:32,236
We can still be friends.
345
00:16:32,238 --> 00:16:34,538
Boy, I don't know if I
could be friends with Howie
346
00:16:34,540 --> 00:16:35,940
if we broke up.
347
00:16:35,942 --> 00:16:36,791
Why not?
348
00:16:36,793 --> 00:16:39,610
I'm a very vengeful person.
349
00:16:39,612 --> 00:16:42,079
Really?
350
00:16:42,081 --> 00:16:45,166
With access
to weaponized smallpox.
351
00:16:47,219 --> 00:16:49,170
Here you go, guys, let me get
you going with some water.
352
00:16:49,172 --> 00:16:50,755
You need menus
or you know what you want?
353
00:16:50,757 --> 00:16:52,206
Leonard knows what he wants,
but it looks
354
00:16:52,208 --> 00:16:54,158
like he's not gonna
get it from you.
355
00:16:55,210 --> 00:16:56,710
Howard.
No,
356
00:16:56,712 --> 00:16:58,095
that's okay, Bernadette.
357
00:16:58,097 --> 00:17:00,348
Sometimes these things
just don't work out.
358
00:17:00,350 --> 00:17:01,816
Yeah, it's all good.
359
00:17:01,818 --> 00:17:04,769
We-We'll always have
feelings for each other.
360
00:17:06,388 --> 00:17:09,223
Oh, that's nice.
361
00:17:09,225 --> 00:17:12,393
See, she knew
what "always" meant.
362
00:17:12,395 --> 00:17:15,196
Wow, you're like a dog
with a bone, aren't you?
363
00:17:15,198 --> 00:17:17,415
I'm just making a point.
364
00:17:17,417 --> 00:17:19,900
Is the point that you don't know
when to let something go?
365
00:17:19,902 --> 00:17:20,751
People, people,
366
00:17:20,753 --> 00:17:22,253
please,
before you say
367
00:17:22,255 --> 00:17:23,838
something you
both regret,
368
00:17:23,840 --> 00:17:25,673
I'd like to place my order.
369
00:17:26,925 --> 00:17:28,459
Yeah, just hang on, Sheldon.
370
00:17:28,461 --> 00:17:29,960
You know why we can't be
together?
371
00:17:29,962 --> 00:17:31,412
Because you always have
to be right.
372
00:17:31,414 --> 00:17:32,913
Oh, that is not true.
373
00:17:32,915 --> 00:17:34,181
I got to go
with Leonard on this.
374
00:17:34,183 --> 00:17:36,684
He is wrong
more than anyone I know.
375
00:17:37,652 --> 00:17:39,353
You know what?
I just realized I'm on a break.
376
00:17:39,355 --> 00:17:40,604
I'll get someone else.
377
00:17:40,606 --> 00:17:42,423
Well...
378
00:17:42,425 --> 00:17:45,142
Leonard, promise me that when
our new waitress comes over,
379
00:17:45,144 --> 00:17:48,145
you will not start a complicated
on-again, off-again relationship
380
00:17:48,147 --> 00:17:50,898
with her,
because I am very, very hungry.
381
00:18:02,461 --> 00:18:04,662
Unbelievable.
382
00:18:08,667 --> 00:18:10,301
Mind explaining to me
why you were being
383
00:18:10,303 --> 00:18:11,836
such a jerk at the restaurant?
Well,
384
00:18:11,838 --> 00:18:13,721
I was trying to act like
we weren't seeing each other.
385
00:18:13,723 --> 00:18:15,122
That was the plan, right?
No,
386
00:18:15,124 --> 00:18:17,458
the plan was to tell people
we decided to stay friends.
387
00:18:17,460 --> 00:18:18,625
That's a little hard to do
388
00:18:18,627 --> 00:18:22,179
when you're always being
such a tool bag.
389
00:18:22,181 --> 00:18:24,982
You know what? I don't have to
stand here and take this crap.
390
00:18:24,984 --> 00:18:26,851
The hell do you think
you're going?
391
00:18:26,853 --> 00:18:30,020
Isn't sex after fighting
kind of what we do now?!
392
00:18:30,022 --> 00:18:32,523
Yeah, kind of, yeah.
393
00:18:40,615 --> 00:18:42,583
What are we doing?
394
00:18:42,585 --> 00:18:43,784
What do you mean?
395
00:18:43,786 --> 00:18:47,505
Every scenario I play out
for you and me ends badly.
396
00:18:47,507 --> 00:18:49,890
That's because you
overthink everything.
397
00:18:49,892 --> 00:18:52,159
Leonard, are you listening
to me?
398
00:18:52,161 --> 00:18:53,594
What?
Yeah.
399
00:18:53,596 --> 00:18:55,596
This is a disaster.
400
00:18:55,598 --> 00:18:56,847
I distinctly ordered
401
00:18:56,849 --> 00:18:59,300
the Leonard Nimoy Mr.
Spock cardboard standee.
402
00:18:59,302 --> 00:19:00,851
Why would
I feel safer
403
00:19:00,853 --> 00:19:03,721
with Zachary Quinto
at the foot of my bed?
404
00:19:04,856 --> 00:19:09,109
I don't know, he was
pretty badass on Heroes.
405
00:19:09,111 --> 00:19:12,346
You're right, I'll
give him a shot.
406
00:19:14,316 --> 00:19:16,200
Hang on.
407
00:19:16,202 --> 00:19:17,868
Penny, do you have
plans for dinner?
408
00:19:17,870 --> 00:19:19,487
Why, you guys going somewhere?
409
00:19:19,489 --> 00:19:20,404
No, I mean just you and me.
410
00:19:20,406 --> 00:19:24,208
Ooh...!
Ooh...!
411
00:19:24,210 --> 00:19:26,710
Uh, have you thought
this through?
412
00:19:26,712 --> 00:19:30,247
Yes, and I think
we should go anyway.
413
00:19:32,968 --> 00:19:33,884
No, can't do it.
414
00:19:33,886 --> 00:19:35,753
Sorry, Quinto,
you're going back.
415
00:19:45,048 --> 00:19:46,831
If you and Leonard
get back together,
416
00:19:46,833 --> 00:19:48,333
Sheldon and I
will finally have someone
417
00:19:48,335 --> 00:19:50,018
to go on double dates with.
418
00:19:50,020 --> 00:19:51,336
What about me and Howard?
419
00:19:51,338 --> 00:19:53,772
Fine, we can double
with you, too.
420
00:19:54,657 --> 00:19:56,975
So insecure.
421
00:19:58,114 --> 00:20:00,865
Where are you guys going to eat?
422
00:20:00,867 --> 00:20:03,684
Penny?
423
00:20:05,037 --> 00:20:10,207
Do you, Penny, take Leonard to
be your lawful wedded husband?
424
00:20:17,549 --> 00:20:19,266
Well, it's
a little late for me
425
00:20:19,268 --> 00:20:21,552
to start saying no,
isn't it?
426
00:20:23,055 --> 00:20:25,056
Penny.
427
00:20:25,058 --> 00:20:26,173
Sorry,
just remembered
428
00:20:26,175 --> 00:20:28,025
I've got to stop
at the drugstore.
429
00:20:28,086 --> 00:20:32,086
== sync, corrected by elderman ==