1
00:00:00,010 --> 00:00:03,500
Your argument is lacking in all scientific merit.
2
00:00:03,500 --> 00:00:05,030
It is well established
3
00:00:05,100 --> 00:00:07,100
Superman cleans his uniform
4
00:00:07,200 --> 00:00:08,830
by flying into Earth's yellow sun,
5
00:00:08,900 --> 00:00:10,800
which incinerates any contaminate matter
6
00:00:10,860 --> 00:00:11,900
and leaves the invulnerable
7
00:00:11,960 --> 00:00:15,360
Kryptonian fabric unharmed and daisy fresh.
8
00:00:16,560 --> 00:00:18,660
What if he gets something Kryptonian on it?
9
00:00:18,730 --> 00:00:19,760
Like what?
10
00:00:19,830 --> 00:00:22,700
I don't know. Kryptonian mustard.
11
00:00:22,760 --> 00:00:25,330
I think we can safely assume that all Kryptonian condiments
12
00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:29,200
were destroyed when the planet Krypton exploded.
13
00:00:29,260 --> 00:00:30,700
Or it turned into mustard Kryptonite,
14
00:00:30,760 --> 00:00:32,030
the only way to destroy
15
00:00:32,100 --> 00:00:35,130
a rogue Kryptonian hotdog threatening Earth.
16
00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:36,600
Raj, please,
17
00:00:36,660 --> 00:00:38,800
let's stay serious here.
18
00:00:38,860 --> 00:00:40,660
Superman's body is Kryptonian,
19
00:00:40,730 --> 00:00:42,400
therefore his sweat is Kryptonian.
20
00:00:42,460 --> 00:00:45,060
Yeah, what about Kryptonian pit stains?
21
00:00:45,130 --> 00:00:47,000
Superman doesn't sweat on Earth.
22
00:00:47,060 --> 00:00:48,430
Okay,
23
00:00:48,500 --> 00:00:50,500
he's invited for dinner in the Bottle City of Kandor.
24
00:00:50,560 --> 00:00:51,960
He miniaturizes himself, enters the city
25
00:00:52,030 --> 00:00:53,500
where he loses his superpowers. Now,
26
00:00:53,560 --> 00:00:54,830
before dinner, his host says,
27
00:00:54,900 --> 00:00:57,030
"Who's up for a little Kryptonian tetherball?"
28
00:00:57,100 --> 00:00:59,030
Superman says "Sure," works up a sweat,
29
00:00:59,100 --> 00:01:00,660
comes back to Earth, his uniform now stained
30
00:01:00,730 --> 00:01:03,160
with indestructible Kryptonian perspiration.
31
00:01:05,700 --> 00:01:08,300
Boo ya.
32
00:01:10,030 --> 00:01:11,630
Superman would have taken his uniform
33
00:01:11,700 --> 00:01:14,160
to a Kandorian dry cleaner before he left the Bottle.
34
00:01:15,700 --> 00:01:17,330
"Kandorian dry cl..." I give up.
35
00:01:17,400 --> 00:01:19,700
You can't have a rational argument with this man.
36
00:01:22,500 --> 00:01:23,460
isn't that the guy who won
37
00:01:23,530 --> 00:01:25,100
the MacArthur genius grant last year?
38
00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:28,030
No, not all at once.
39
00:01:28,100 --> 00:01:29,530
Then how?
40
00:01:29,600 --> 00:01:30,800
Leonard.
41
00:01:32,530 --> 00:01:33,700
Now, Raj.
42
00:01:35,860 --> 00:01:37,030
Now, Sheldon.
43
00:01:39,500 --> 00:01:40,930
I didn't get a good look. Can I go again?
44
00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:42,430
No.
45
00:01:42,500 --> 00:01:44,460
It's David Underhill. So what?
46
00:01:44,530 --> 00:01:45,600
So what?
47
00:01:45,660 --> 00:01:47,800
His observation of high-energy positrons
48
00:01:47,860 --> 00:01:49,500
has provided the first conclusive evidence
49
00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:51,530
for the existence of galactic dark matter.
50
00:01:51,600 --> 00:01:52,730
I have two words for you.
51
00:01:52,800 --> 00:01:54,130
The first is "big," the other's "whoop."
52
00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:56,260
It is a big whoop.
53
00:01:56,330 --> 00:01:57,700
It made almost all the work
54
00:01:57,760 --> 00:01:59,500
you've done since you've been here completely useless.
55
00:01:59,560 --> 00:02:00,660
Did not. Did, too.
56
00:02:00,730 --> 00:02:01,760
Did...
57
00:02:01,830 --> 00:02:03,030
Okay, maybe some of it, but...
58
00:02:04,760 --> 00:02:06,560
Look, the guy was just in the right place,
59
00:02:06,630 --> 00:02:08,200
at the right time with the right paradigm-shifting
60
00:02:08,260 --> 00:02:11,760
reinterpretation of the universe. He got lucky.
61
00:02:11,830 --> 00:02:13,100
In more ways than one.
62
00:02:13,160 --> 00:02:16,430
He's a very handsome man.
63
00:02:16,500 --> 00:02:18,900
Doesn't do anything for me. If I was gonna go that way,
64
00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:22,200
I'm more of a Zac Ephron kinda guy.
65
00:02:23,460 --> 00:02:26,530
Oh, yeah, like you have a shot with Zac Ephron.
66
00:02:27,900 --> 00:02:28,830
Excuse me...
67
00:02:28,900 --> 00:02:30,630
Are you Leonard Hofstadter?
68
00:02:30,700 --> 00:02:32,060
Uh... yeah.
69
00:02:32,130 --> 00:02:33,130
I'm David Underhill.
70
00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:36,460
Uh... y-yeah.
71
00:02:36,530 --> 00:02:37,900
Yeah, Dr. Gablehauser said if I wanted
72
00:02:37,960 --> 00:02:39,530
to set something up in the photomultiplier lab,
73
00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:41,360
that you'd be able to give me a hand?
74
00:02:41,430 --> 00:02:43,300
You want to work with me? Well,
75
00:02:43,360 --> 00:02:44,530
if you have a little time, yeah.
76
00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:47,030
Wow.... Y-yeah, sure.
77
00:02:47,100 --> 00:02:49,000
Yeah, no problem. Uh...
78
00:02:49,060 --> 00:02:50,460
Here's my home number.
79
00:02:50,530 --> 00:02:51,460
Here's my cell.
80
00:02:51,530 --> 00:02:53,460
Here's my office.
81
00:02:53,530 --> 00:02:56,660
Here's my parents' number up in New Jersey.
82
00:02:56,730 --> 00:02:58,530
They always know how to reach me. So... Okay.
83
00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:01,530
Congratulations on the MacArthur Grant, by the way. Big fan.
84
00:03:01,600 --> 00:03:03,660
Thanks. I'll call you.
85
00:03:03,730 --> 00:03:05,430
Okay.
86
00:03:05,500 --> 00:03:07,200
Bye-bye!
87
00:03:11,060 --> 00:03:12,160
What are you looking at?
88
00:03:12,230 --> 00:03:13,660
You've never seen a hypocrite before?
89
00:03:39,460 --> 00:03:41,100
Trailing badly, Wolowitz needs a strike
90
00:03:41,160 --> 00:03:43,560
if he has any hopes of catching up with Sheldon Cooper,
91
00:03:43,630 --> 00:03:45,260
who is dominating in the ninth frame
92
00:03:45,330 --> 00:03:47,780
with a career-best 68.
93
00:03:57,300 --> 00:03:59,560
Hey, guys!
94
00:03:59,630 --> 00:04:00,700
That doesn't count.
95
00:04:00,760 --> 00:04:02,200
Do over! Do over!
96
00:04:02,260 --> 00:04:04,700
There are no do-overs in Wii bowling.
97
00:04:04,760 --> 00:04:09,030
There are always do-overs when my people play sports.
98
00:04:09,100 --> 00:04:11,230
Where were you that's more important
99
00:04:11,300 --> 00:04:12,400
than Wii bowling night?
100
00:04:12,460 --> 00:04:13,400
Actually, I was...
101
00:04:13,460 --> 00:04:14,430
It's a rhetorical question.
102
00:04:14,500 --> 00:04:15,560
There is nothing more important
103
00:04:15,630 --> 00:04:17,200
than Wii bowling night.
104
00:04:17,260 --> 00:04:19,430
Come on, it's just a video game.
105
00:04:19,500 --> 00:04:20,460
And we suck at it.
106
00:04:21,700 --> 00:04:24,800
Nice motivational speech from the team captain.
107
00:04:25,730 --> 00:04:26,760
Where were you?
108
00:04:26,830 --> 00:04:28,400
I was working with Dave Underhill.
109
00:04:28,460 --> 00:04:32,660
Ooh, "Dave." Sounds like Leonard's got a new BFF.
110
00:04:32,730 --> 00:04:34,930
Actually, he's pretty cool.
111
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:37,260
I mean, not only is he a brilliant scientist,
112
00:04:37,330 --> 00:04:39,660
but it turns out he's a Black Diamond skier.
113
00:04:39,730 --> 00:04:42,930
He collects vintage motorcycles. He plays in a rock band.
114
00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:45,800
So? We're in a rock band.
115
00:04:45,860 --> 00:04:46,800
No...
116
00:04:46,860 --> 00:04:50,230
We play Rock Band on our X-Box.
117
00:04:50,300 --> 00:04:54,330
Nice motivational speech from our lead guitarist.
118
00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:55,400
He's funny, too.
119
00:04:55,460 --> 00:04:57,560
He does this hysterical impersonation
120
00:04:57,630 --> 00:04:59,860
of Stephen Hawking having phone sex.
121
00:05:00,960 --> 00:05:03,800
What are you wearing?
122
00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:06,530
That's not... He does it better.
123
00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:09,230
Anyway, he said he was gonna take me to the gym tomorrow,
124
00:05:09,300 --> 00:05:10,930
so I'm gonna go practice my situps.
125
00:05:11,930 --> 00:05:15,930
Whoa. Humongous man crush, dude.
126
00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:19,660
Yeah. It's officially a bro-mance.
127
00:05:19,730 --> 00:05:21,560
Hey, Sheldon, are you and Leonard
128
00:05:21,630 --> 00:05:22,930
putting up a Christmas tree?
129
00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:24,560
No, because we don't celebrate
130
00:05:24,630 --> 00:05:27,230
the ancient pagan festival of Saturnalia.
131
00:05:28,630 --> 00:05:29,800
Saturnalia?
132
00:05:29,860 --> 00:05:31,130
Gather round, kids,
133
00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:35,530
it's time for Sheldon's beloved Christmas special.
134
00:05:36,500 --> 00:05:37,930
In the pre-Christian era,
135
00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:40,460
as the winter solstice approached and the plants died,
136
00:05:40,530 --> 00:05:42,930
pagans brought evergreen boughs into their homes
137
00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:44,960
as an act of sympathetic magic, intended
138
00:05:45,030 --> 00:05:47,860
to guard the life essences of the plants until spring.
139
00:05:47,930 --> 00:05:49,600
This custom was later appropriated
140
00:05:49,660 --> 00:05:51,600
by Northern Europeans and eventually it becomes
141
00:05:51,660 --> 00:05:53,660
the so-called Christmas tree.
142
00:05:55,700 --> 00:05:59,430
And that, Charlie Brown, is what boredom is all about.
143
00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:02,100
Okay, well, thank you
144
00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:03,700
for that, but I got you and Leonard
145
00:06:03,760 --> 00:06:05,260
a few silly neighbor gifts, so I'll just
146
00:06:05,330 --> 00:06:06,260
put them under my tree.
147
00:06:06,330 --> 00:06:07,130
Wait!
148
00:06:07,960 --> 00:06:09,160
You bought me a present?
149
00:06:10,300 --> 00:06:12,330
Why would you do such a thing?
150
00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:15,030
I don't know. 'Cause it's Christmas?
151
00:06:15,100 --> 00:06:17,530
Oh, Penny. I know you think you're being generous,
152
00:06:17,600 --> 00:06:20,430
but the foundation of gift-giving is reciprocity.
153
00:06:20,500 --> 00:06:22,100
You haven't given me a gift.
154
00:06:22,160 --> 00:06:24,630
You've given me an obligation.
155
00:06:26,260 --> 00:06:28,900
Don't feel bad, Penny, it's a classic rookie mistake.
156
00:06:28,960 --> 00:06:30,300
My first Hanukkah with Sheldon,
157
00:06:30,360 --> 00:06:32,060
he yelled at me for eight nights.
158
00:06:34,330 --> 00:06:36,530
Now, hey, it's okay.You don't have to get me anything in return.
159
00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:38,400
Of course I do. The essence of the custom
160
00:06:38,460 --> 00:06:40,860
is that I now have to go out and purchase for you
161
00:06:40,930 --> 00:06:42,360
a gift of commensurate value
162
00:06:42,430 --> 00:06:44,600
and representing the same perceived level of friendship
163
00:06:44,660 --> 00:06:47,800
as that represented by the gift you've given me.
164
00:06:47,860 --> 00:06:51,100
It's no wonder suicide rates skyrocket this time of year.
165
00:06:51,160 --> 00:06:52,830
Okay, you know what? Forget it.
166
00:06:52,900 --> 00:06:54,100
I'm not giving you a present.
167
00:06:54,160 --> 00:06:56,060
No, it's too late. I see it. That elf sticker
168
00:06:56,130 --> 00:06:57,230
says, "To Sheldon."
169
00:06:58,860 --> 00:07:00,060
The die has been cast.
170
00:07:00,130 --> 00:07:01,530
[欧玛尔·海亚姆波斯诗人 此句曾被马丁·路德·金引用]
171
00:07:01,600 --> 00:07:03,330
[迦太基名将汉尼拔曾率领军队及大象翻越积雪的阿尔卑斯山进入意大利]
172
00:07:05,330 --> 00:07:06,300
I know. It's funny
173
00:07:06,360 --> 00:07:08,660
when it's not happening to us.
174
00:07:09,730 --> 00:07:13,330
Sheldon, I am very, very sorry.
175
00:07:13,400 --> 00:07:15,030
No. No, I brought this on myself
176
00:07:15,100 --> 00:07:18,560
by being such an endearing and important part of your life.
177
00:07:19,730 --> 00:07:22,130
I'm going to need a ride to the mall.
178
00:07:23,130 --> 00:07:25,430
It's happening to us.
179
00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:30,760
Are you gonna make it?
180
00:07:30,830 --> 00:07:31,960
Yeah, I guess.
181
00:07:32,030 --> 00:07:33,160
All right.
182
00:07:33,230 --> 00:07:36,560
Thanks for letting me try out your motorcycle.
183
00:07:36,630 --> 00:07:39,100
No problem.
184
00:07:39,160 --> 00:07:42,460
I had no idea it was so heavy.
185
00:07:42,530 --> 00:07:45,260
The thing just fell right over on me, didn't it?
186
00:07:45,330 --> 00:07:47,960
Yeah. Lucky for you it wasn't moving.
187
00:07:48,030 --> 00:07:50,930
-Oh, hey, Leonard. Ooh, are you okay? -Oh, yeah.
188
00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:53,430
It's just a little motorcycle accident.
189
00:07:53,500 --> 00:07:55,300
My God, how fast were you going?
190
00:07:55,360 --> 00:07:57,860
I don't know. It's all such a blur.
191
00:07:59,460 --> 00:08:01,430
Good one. He couldn't even get it started.
192
00:08:02,330 --> 00:08:03,930
Hi. Dave. Hi.
193
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:06,060
Penny. So it's your motorcycle?
194
00:08:06,930 --> 00:08:07,860
Is it okay?
195
00:08:07,930 --> 00:08:08,860
It's fine.
196
00:08:08,930 --> 00:08:10,530
Lucky for the bike
197
00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:12,760
it landed on my leg.
198
00:08:12,830 --> 00:08:15,060
You mind giving me a hand with speed racer here?
199
00:08:15,130 --> 00:08:16,300
Oh, yeah. Yeah, sure.
200
00:08:16,360 --> 00:08:18,900
So, um, Dave, how do you know Leonard?
201
00:08:18,960 --> 00:08:20,100
I'm a physicist.
202
00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:23,430
No, you're not.
203
00:08:23,500 --> 00:08:25,230
Why is that so surprising?
204
00:08:25,300 --> 00:08:27,760
Uh, well, it's just that the physicists I know
205
00:08:27,830 --> 00:08:31,430
are indoorsy and pale.
206
00:08:31,500 --> 00:08:32,760
I'm not indoorsy.
207
00:08:32,830 --> 00:08:34,430
I just wear the appropriate sun block
208
00:08:34,500 --> 00:08:36,660
because I don't take melanoma lightly.
209
00:08:36,730 --> 00:08:37,900
So, are you
210
00:08:37,960 --> 00:08:39,660
and Leonard working on an experiment together?
211
00:08:39,730 --> 00:08:40,900
Yeah, actually we are.
212
00:08:40,960 --> 00:08:42,430
Yeah, we're examining the radiation levels
213
00:08:42,500 --> 00:08:43,460
of photomultiplier tubes
214
00:08:43,530 --> 00:08:44,930
for a new dark matter detector.
215
00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:46,030
Uh, sweetie, sweetie,
216
00:08:46,100 --> 00:08:48,360
Dave was talking.
217
00:08:48,430 --> 00:08:50,600
You know, I love science.
218
00:08:50,660 --> 00:08:52,930
-Since when? -Since always.
219
00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:55,260
Call me a geek, but I am just nuts
220
00:08:55,330 --> 00:08:57,730
for the whole subatomic- particle thing.
221
00:08:57,800 --> 00:09:00,460
The last thing I would ever call you is a geek.
222
00:09:00,530 --> 00:09:02,400
Ha. Well, that's what I am--
223
00:09:02,460 --> 00:09:03,730
queen of the nerds.
224
00:09:03,800 --> 00:09:05,760
Well, if you like,
225
00:09:05,830 --> 00:09:07,730
I could show you the lab we're working in.
226
00:09:07,800 --> 00:09:10,200
We've got some cool toys, you know-- lasers and stuff.
227
00:09:10,260 --> 00:09:13,660
You know, I have always wanted to see a big science lab.
228
00:09:13,730 --> 00:09:14,660
Since when?
229
00:09:14,730 --> 00:09:16,500
Since always.
230
00:09:16,560 --> 00:09:18,200
Leonard, are you okay here? Uh...
231
00:09:18,260 --> 00:09:20,430
-Yeah. I guess. -How 'bout we go see it now?
232
00:09:20,500 --> 00:09:22,360
Maybe afterwards we take the bike up the coast,
233
00:09:22,430 --> 00:09:23,800
We grab a little bite to eat...
234
00:09:23,860 --> 00:09:25,500
Um... Yeah. Yeah, that sounds great.
235
00:09:25,560 --> 00:09:26,760
Let me just get my jacket.
236
00:09:31,300 --> 00:09:34,560
Boy, she'll do, huh?
237
00:09:34,630 --> 00:09:37,100
Yeah, if you like that type.
238
00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:39,200
So, you and her...?
239
00:09:39,260 --> 00:09:40,260
No, just neighbors.
240
00:09:40,330 --> 00:09:41,530
Really.
241
00:09:41,600 --> 00:09:43,600
I don't know how you live next door to that
242
00:09:43,660 --> 00:09:45,700
without doing something about it.
243
00:09:46,830 --> 00:09:48,900
Actually...
244
00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:50,600
science is my lady.
245
00:09:53,160 --> 00:09:54,100
Okay. Let's go.
246
00:09:54,160 --> 00:09:55,100
All right.
247
00:09:55,160 --> 00:09:56,460
See you tomorrow, Leonard.
248
00:09:56,530 --> 00:09:58,460
See ya. 'Bye, Penny.
249
00:09:58,530 --> 00:10:00,100
Have fun.
250
00:10:04,660 --> 00:10:05,860
Yes?
251
00:10:13,500 --> 00:10:15,500
Did you forget your key?
252
00:10:25,460 --> 00:10:29,130
I don't see anything in here a woman would want.
253
00:10:29,200 --> 00:10:31,260
You're kidding.
254
00:10:31,330 --> 00:10:34,530
You've got lotions and bath oils and soaps.
255
00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:37,660
that's the estrogen hat trick.
256
00:10:37,730 --> 00:10:41,130
What it is is a cacophonous assault
257
00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:43,860
of eucalyptus, bayberry, cinnamon and vanilla.
258
00:10:43,930 --> 00:10:48,260
It's as if my head were trapped in the pajamas of a sultan.
259
00:10:48,330 --> 00:10:50,360
Sheldon, if you don't like this stuff,
260
00:10:50,430 --> 00:10:53,530
let's just go next door and build her a bear.
261
00:10:53,600 --> 00:10:57,300
I told you before, bears are terrifying.
262
00:10:57,360 --> 00:10:59,200
Come on,
263
00:10:59,260 --> 00:11:01,130
bath stuff. It's perfect!
264
00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:04,030
You got a scented candle, a cleansing buff,
265
00:11:04,100 --> 00:11:06,730
spearmint and green tea scented bath oil, promotes relaxation.
266
00:11:06,800 --> 00:11:08,500
That presupposes Penny is tense.
267
00:11:08,560 --> 00:11:09,830
She knows you. She's tense.
268
00:11:09,900 --> 00:11:11,530
We all are. Buy a basket!
269
00:11:11,600 --> 00:11:13,030
Excuse me, we're ready.
270
00:11:13,100 --> 00:11:14,560
No, we're not.
271
00:11:14,630 --> 00:11:16,530
Let's say for a moment that I accept
272
00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:18,330
the bath item gift hypothesis,
273
00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:20,400
I now lay the following conundrum at your feet:
274
00:11:20,460 --> 00:11:22,830
Which size?
275
00:11:22,900 --> 00:11:24,760
This one. Let's go.
276
00:11:24,830 --> 00:11:26,360
You put no thought into that.
277
00:11:26,430 --> 00:11:28,800
I'm sorry. Uh... this one.
278
00:11:28,860 --> 00:11:30,700
Let's go!
279
00:11:31,730 --> 00:11:33,700
I have insufficient data to proceed.
280
00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:35,100
Excuse me, miss?
281
00:11:35,160 --> 00:11:36,330
Yes?
282
00:11:36,400 --> 00:11:39,100
If I were to give you this gift basket,
283
00:11:39,160 --> 00:11:41,630
based on that action alone and no other data,
284
00:11:41,700 --> 00:11:44,200
infer and describe the hypothetical relationship
285
00:11:44,260 --> 00:11:46,400
that exists between us.
286
00:11:46,460 --> 00:11:49,230
Excuse me?
287
00:11:49,300 --> 00:11:51,360
Here.
288
00:11:51,430 --> 00:11:53,600
Now, are we friends?
289
00:11:53,660 --> 00:11:56,430
Colleagues? Lovers?
290
00:11:56,500 --> 00:11:58,560
Are you my grandmother?
291
00:12:00,100 --> 00:12:02,260
I don't understand what you're talking about
292
00:12:02,330 --> 00:12:04,400
and you're making me a little uncomfortable.
293
00:12:06,060 --> 00:12:07,200
See? Sounds just like you and Penny.
294
00:12:07,260 --> 00:12:08,430
We'll take it.
295
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:14,500
Hey, Leonard. Come, join us.
296
00:12:15,260 --> 00:12:16,300
Oh, hey, Dave.
297
00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:18,560
And Penny, what a surprise.
298
00:12:18,630 --> 00:12:19,930
Hey, Leonard.
299
00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:21,160
Dave was just showing me around the university.
300
00:12:21,230 --> 00:12:22,500
You know, this place
301
00:12:22,560 --> 00:12:23,660
is unbelievable!
302
00:12:23,730 --> 00:12:24,960
Yeah, I know. I've been offering
303
00:12:25,030 --> 00:12:27,500
to show you around for a year and a half.
304
00:12:27,560 --> 00:12:29,330
You always said you had yoga.
305
00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:31,060
I never said that.
306
00:12:31,130 --> 00:12:33,000
Maybe I heard you wrong.
307
00:12:33,060 --> 00:12:35,500
A lot of words sound like "yoga."
308
00:12:35,560 --> 00:12:37,830
This is an amazing woman, Leonard.
309
00:12:37,900 --> 00:12:40,030
She has a curious and agile mind,
310
00:12:40,100 --> 00:12:43,100
not to mention being curious and agile in other respects.
311
00:12:43,160 --> 00:12:45,100
Oh, shut up!
312
00:12:45,160 --> 00:12:47,760
Yes, please shut up.
313
00:12:47,830 --> 00:12:50,330
So, um, Dave,
314
00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:52,700
don't you think you and I should get back to the lab?
315
00:12:52,760 --> 00:12:55,100
You know, that dark matter isn't going to detect itself.
316
00:12:59,130 --> 00:13:01,230
Actually, I was thinking about taking the afternoon off
317
00:13:01,300 --> 00:13:03,160
so I could work on another experiment with Penny.
318
00:13:03,230 --> 00:13:06,000
Really? We're going to do an experiment?
319
00:13:06,060 --> 00:13:08,030
Uh-huh. We're going to explore the effects of tequila shots
320
00:13:08,100 --> 00:13:10,530
on a gorgeous 22-year-old woman.
321
00:13:10,600 --> 00:13:11,860
It's not an experiment!
322
00:13:11,930 --> 00:13:13,860
You saw what happened last night.
323
00:13:16,300 --> 00:13:17,260
You ready to go? Yeah.
324
00:13:17,330 --> 00:13:18,500
Oh, can I drive the motorcycle?
325
00:13:18,560 --> 00:13:19,760
Yeah, why not?
326
00:13:19,830 --> 00:13:21,930
You can't do any worse than Leonard.
327
00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:24,300
That's funny.
328
00:13:26,430 --> 00:13:28,260
By the way, my leg is killing me.
329
00:13:28,330 --> 00:13:30,630
Thanks for asking.
330
00:13:51,700 --> 00:13:55,000
Mmm, great news, Leonard.
331
00:13:55,060 --> 00:13:57,260
I've solved my Penny gift dilemma.
332
00:13:57,330 --> 00:13:59,560
Yippee.
333
00:13:59,630 --> 00:14:02,630
You see, the danger was that I might under or over-reciprocate,
334
00:14:02,700 --> 00:14:04,630
but I have devised a foolproof plan.
335
00:14:04,700 --> 00:14:07,560
See, I will open her gift to me first
336
00:14:07,630 --> 00:14:09,000
and then excuse myself,
337
00:14:09,060 --> 00:14:11,830
feigning digestive distress.
338
00:14:11,900 --> 00:14:13,830
Then I'll look up the price of her gift online,
339
00:14:13,900 --> 00:14:15,930
choose the basket closest to that value,
340
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:17,530
give it to her
341
00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:21,330
and then I'll return the others for a full refund.
342
00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:23,730
Brilliant.
343
00:14:23,800 --> 00:14:26,260
It is, isn't it?
344
00:14:26,330 --> 00:14:28,900
Is it okay if I hide them in your room?
345
00:14:28,960 --> 00:14:31,900
The smell makes me nauseated.
346
00:14:31,960 --> 00:14:33,300
Do whatever you want.
347
00:14:33,360 --> 00:14:35,230
Thank you, that's very gracious.
348
00:14:36,700 --> 00:14:38,030
Gentlemen.
349
00:14:41,900 --> 00:14:44,530
Why couldn't you have just done what Leonard did
350
00:14:44,600 --> 00:14:47,530
and get Penny a new boyfriend?
351
00:14:49,600 --> 00:14:52,260
My leg is killing me.
352
00:14:52,330 --> 00:14:54,630
Thanks for asking.
353
00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:07,500
Okay, I have just one question for you.
354
00:15:07,560 --> 00:15:10,300
While I am perfectly happy with the way things are between us,
355
00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:11,700
you said that you didn't want
356
00:15:11,760 --> 00:15:13,760
to go out with me because I was too smart for you!
357
00:15:13,830 --> 00:15:16,060
Well, news flash, lady
358
00:15:16,130 --> 00:15:18,530
David Underhill is ten times smarter than me!
359
00:15:18,600 --> 00:15:20,830
You'd have to drive a railroad spike into his brain
360
00:15:20,900 --> 00:15:23,160
for me to beat him at checkers!
361
00:15:23,230 --> 00:15:24,430
Next to him,
362
00:15:24,500 --> 00:15:26,560
I'm like one of those sign-language gorillas
363
00:15:26,630 --> 00:15:28,830
who knows how to ask for grapes!
364
00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:31,860
So, my question is...
365
00:15:31,930 --> 00:15:34,900
What's up with that?!
366
00:15:34,960 --> 00:15:38,330
Why are you yelling at me?
367
00:15:38,400 --> 00:15:40,430
Sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
368
00:15:40,500 --> 00:15:43,060
Never mind, we're cool.
369
00:15:43,130 --> 00:15:44,530
Dave is not smarter than you.
370
00:15:44,600 --> 00:15:45,830
He's an idiot.
371
00:15:46,900 --> 00:15:50,160
Really? Why would you say that?
372
00:15:50,230 --> 00:15:52,630
Because a smart guy takes the nude photos of his wife
373
00:15:52,700 --> 00:15:55,060
off his cell phone before he tries to take nude photos
374
00:15:55,130 --> 00:15:57,900
of his girlfriend.
375
00:15:58,930 --> 00:16:00,460
He tried to take nude photos of you?
376
00:16:00,530 --> 00:16:04,400
That's what you took from that?!
377
00:16:05,630 --> 00:16:08,360
The guy is married!
378
00:16:08,430 --> 00:16:09,760
Oh, yeah.
379
00:16:09,830 --> 00:16:13,460
I'm so-- Oh, that's terrible.
380
00:16:13,530 --> 00:16:15,160
And you, if you are so okay
381
00:16:15,230 --> 00:16:16,330
with the way things are between us,
382
00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:17,700
why are you so jealous?
383
00:16:17,760 --> 00:16:19,030
Well, uh...
384
00:16:20,960 --> 00:16:24,360
The important thing is he's married and that's terrible!
385
00:16:26,430 --> 00:16:28,930
Nice save, genius.
386
00:16:29,030 --> 00:16:30,400
Eggnog?
387
00:16:30,460 --> 00:16:32,730
Lactose.
388
00:16:32,800 --> 00:16:34,760
It's just rum.
389
00:16:34,830 --> 00:16:38,200
It stopped being eggnog like half an hour ago.
390
00:16:41,660 --> 00:16:44,900
Smooth.
391
00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:48,300
Smoother than you.
392
00:16:48,360 --> 00:16:51,960
Come on, it's Christmas, just give me this one.
393
00:16:53,030 --> 00:16:56,860
Okay, Merry Christmas.
394
00:17:01,160 --> 00:17:03,160
By the way, my leg is killing me.
395
00:17:03,230 --> 00:17:06,200
Thanks for asking.
396
00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:14,800
- Merry Christmas. - Merry Christmas.
397
00:17:14,860 --> 00:17:15,900
How's your leg?
398
00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:17,230
Very good, thanks for asking. Come on in.
399
00:17:19,230 --> 00:17:23,200
Ah, good, Penny, you're here to exchange gifts.
400
00:17:26,500 --> 00:17:27,760
You'll be pleased to know
401
00:17:27,830 --> 00:17:31,130
I'm prepared for whatever you have to offer.
402
00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:32,730
Okay, here.
403
00:17:35,760 --> 00:17:40,130
I should note I'm having some digestive distress,
404
00:17:41,930 --> 00:17:46,730
so, if I excuse myself abruptly, don't be alarmed.
405
00:17:53,260 --> 00:17:57,200
Oh, a napkin.
406
00:17:57,260 --> 00:18:00,130
Turn it over.
407
00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:08,160
"To Sheldon,
408
00:18:08,230 --> 00:18:11,600
"live long and prosper.
409
00:18:11,660 --> 00:18:14,900
Leonard Nimoy."
410
00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:18,860
Yeah, he came into the restaurant.
411
00:18:18,930 --> 00:18:21,000
Sorry the napkin's dirty. He wiped his mouth with it.
412
00:18:26,600 --> 00:18:30,600
I possess the DNA of Leonard Nimoy?!
413
00:18:33,960 --> 00:18:37,100
Well...
414
00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:39,760
Yeah, yeah. I guess.
415
00:18:39,830 --> 00:18:41,730
But look, he signed it.
416
00:18:41,800 --> 00:18:44,660
Do you realize what this means?!
417
00:18:45,960 --> 00:18:48,500
All I need is a healthy ovum
418
00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:52,830
and I can grow my own Leonard Nimoy!
419
00:18:55,900 --> 00:19:00,030
Okay, all I'm giving you is the napkin, Sheldon.
420
00:19:02,060 --> 00:19:04,200
Be right back.
421
00:19:06,560 --> 00:19:08,560
Here. Open it.
422
00:19:10,930 --> 00:19:16,030
Oh, a gift cerficate for motorcycle lessons.
423
00:19:17,930 --> 00:19:19,930
Very thoughtful.
424
00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:20,960
Yeah, and I checked.
425
00:19:21,030 --> 00:19:22,400
Not letting the bike fall on you
426
00:19:22,460 --> 00:19:25,430
while standing still is lesson one.
427
00:19:25,500 --> 00:19:28,900
Oh, then, I think you'll appreciate what I got you.
428
00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:30,960
Okay.
429
00:19:33,530 --> 00:19:37,500
"101 Totally Cool Science Experiments for Kids."
430
00:19:42,560 --> 00:19:45,260
You know, 'cause you're so into science.
431
00:19:55,560 --> 00:19:58,400
Sheldon! What did you do?!
432
00:19:58,460 --> 00:20:00,560
I know!
433
00:20:00,630 --> 00:20:03,430
It's not enough, is it?
434
00:20:05,900 --> 00:20:07,600
Here.
435
00:20:20,100 --> 00:20:24,160
Leonard, look! Sheldon's hugging me.
436
00:20:24,230 --> 00:20:27,630
It's a Saturnalia miracle.
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00